On Call

It's almost midnight and I'm waiting on Jared to get home from a hospital visit in Beaumont. For those of you who think pastors only work on Wednesdays and Sundays....that's not true. Pastors are on call 24/7. I'm thankful for my husband and the ministry that we're apart of and I wouldn't trade it for anything. But while I'm waiting, I can't sleep. There's so much going around in my head.

1. I worked in my classroom today for a while. I haven't been up there all summer, mostly b/c it's impossible to take Sam with me (and I wouldn't want him there anyway...yuck). Today I began the daunting task of unpacking all my boxes. I moved rooms this year so my stuff had been moved already, but my room is far from being set up. I got everything unpacked, but still need to decorate. Then Lindsay and I headed to Manning's in Beaumont. I sure hyped that place up for her. Unfortunately, they had everything I was looking for and nothing for her. I did use my coupon to save 15%, which I was SUPER excited about. I'm trying to use coupons and trying some money saving tips.

2. My sister had her baby last night. I'm not there, I've only talked to her briefly this morning, and I've only seen a picture. That makes me very sad. And airline tickets have gone up...again.

3. I'm still struggling with this whole new season of life thing. I know it's stupid...it really is. But I feel like I'm no longer able to be spontaneous and fun anymore. I feel old.

4. In a week Sam will be one year old. How did this happen? How could he grow up so fast right before my very eyes? And what is going on with the new stubborn phase? Is he going to be like this forever? How do I make him stop doing this? Is he teething again? And the questions go on and on and on.

This is what my nights have been like for the past few weeks. Laying in bed thinking of any of the previous four points and sometimes even more things. Then I have to stop myself and realize that all I'm doing is worrying and being anxious, which goes against what God's Word tells me.

"Do not be anxious about ANYTHING, but in EVERYTHING, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends ALL understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

That's when I realize that I haven't given anything to the Lord. I haven't given Him my thoughts, my worries, my anxieties, nothing. I've kept them all to myself, and look where it has gotten me. No better than I was before. So now I'm off to bed. To give God my heart so that He can give me His peace and rest.

Thank you Lord for Your Word and Your promises. Thank you that we have your Word that "does not return void."