Lessons learned on Faith

Since finding out about the possibility of not having a job and then receiving my letter about not getting a contract next year, the Lord has been doing a mighty work on my faith. Here are some of the things that He's been teaching me through this whole experience:

1. Your faith is only as strong as it is during the tough times. Does that make sense? I just got up from the computer and tried explaining this to Jared, and I even asked him to reword it so that it made sense to everyone. He said it made perfect sense so if it doesn't to you, take it up with him. :) What I mean by this is, I feel like for me, God has been teaching me that it's really easy to SAY you have faith when everything is going great. But what about when everything isn't? What about when you lose your job? What kind of faith do you really have if when the going gets tough, you bail out?


2. Faith is about losing or rather GIVING control. If you know me at all, then you know that I am a planner, most of the time I'm super organized with lists about the lists that I have, and I'm a little OCD about random stuff that only bugs the mess out of me. Now, in almost every area of life this works for me. I get stuff done, I'm an organized structured teacher who thrives on routines and consistencies, which most children thrive in as well. So it works...MOST of the time. However, in the area of faith being a control freak is definitely a hindrance. When you're a control freak you have to have a plan and you have to know what's going on...AT ALL TIMES! Faith is believing that someone else has a better plan than you're own (what?!?!) and that you have to trust that God's plans and control are better than yours. For me, the control part is the hardest. I have no doubt trusting in God's plans. I know my life in His Hands will be way better than anything I could ever orchestrate myself. But the releasing of control is hard. You see....I trust God and believe God, but I want Him to let me in on the plan. In my relationship with God in particular, God keeps me waiting. Now sometimes I like to think that God has a sense of humor in torturing me, but all jokes aside I know exactly why he keeps me in the dark most of the time. Because HE KNOWS ME. He created my inmost being. He knows exactly how I'm wired....He made me that way! So it comes as no surprise that keeping me in the dark is the Father's way of keeping my faith in constant exercise. Remember when you were in P.E. or athletics? I was in P.E. (of course) but we did these exercises in drill team as well. You had to lean against the wall and sit as if you were in a chair. Now for the first few seconds, you were good. Your beautiful thigh muscles were working for you. But before long, your thighs started shaking and you felt as if you were about to fall over. That's what I feel like right now. God is building my faith muscles and right now my muscles are shaking and I feel like I might fall over, but I know if I keep up these exercises that my faith will come out stronger. Wow....hard lesson to be learning these days.

3. Key verses that have been especially encouraging right now:
James 1: 2-4 "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." What that tells me is: 1. Don't try to get out of trials. 2. These trials are going to grow your faith and even though that's hard, the end result SHOULD BE a joy.

Matthew 6: 26-27 "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?" What that tells me: God loves you so much more than all of creation and He takes care of them. He'll take care of me. Stop worrying. We recite this verse a lot in our house, particularly after we write out all our bills for the month and we see what's left in our checkbook. :) We simply say "birds and flowers"...I should get a sign made that says that.

I wanted to write down all these things God's been teaching me for a couple of reasons. 1. It's really therapeutic. 2. I know that as time goes by, God will continue to show me why I'm going through this, and what HIS purpose is for it. 3. Maybe this could be an encouragement to you, for whatever trial you're going through.

~Elizabeth