Thankfulness

I'll go ahead and tell you that this blog will probably be more beneficial for me than you...sorry. I'm just having one of those weird days where I need to process things. Writing helps me process things.

I'm in this weird phase of my life, where I'm learning a lot and growing a lot but in difficult ways. This morning on my way to church I was having myself a good 'ol pity party...yep I said it. I, Elizabeth, pastor's wife, sister, daughter, future mother, insert whatever title you want, was having a pity party...and on the way to church! I ought to be ashamed of myself. Well, I'm not. God is working all the time, even in the midst of my self pity. While I was thinking about all the stuff I had going on in my mindspace this song came on the radio. I'm not sure the specific title but the song goes like this:

All who sail the sea of faith
Find out before too long
How quickly blue skies can grow dark
And gentle winds grow strong
Suddenly fear is like white water
Pounding on the soul
Still we sail on knowing
That our Lord is in control

Sometimes He calms the storm
With a whispered peace be still
He can settle any sea
But it doesn't mean He will
Sometimes He holds us close
And lets the wind and waves go wild
Sometimes He calms the storm
And other times He calms His child

He has a reason for each trial
That we pass through in life
And though we're shaken
We cannot be pulled apart from Christ
No matter how the driving rain beats down
On those who hold to faith
A heart of trust will always
Be a quiet peaceful place"

As I was driving and listening the Lord reminded me that just because things aren't going "my way" doesn't mean He's not there. It doesn't mean He's not listening or knowing my heart. It just means that sometimes He has another plan on working things out. I really needed to hear that in that very moment. Isn't that cool how God does that? I love it. Only God knew my thoughts that morning as I was driving to church, and only He could've brought that peace and revealed some truth through that song. My dad told me one time that every song comes with a memory. I remember the first time I heard that song. I was sitting in the kitchen of my pastor's wife's house. She was playing the song for me and telling me that she thought about singing it in church. Looking back, I see how strong of a woman she was. I knew what was going on in her life when we were listening to that song. Things I haven't had to deal with but she did. She knew that the Lord was in control, just like I needed that reminder this morning. God doesn't always swoop down with an easy fix. Sometimes I wish He would, but that's not how it always works. In the meantime, I have to learn to trust Him and His plans for my life.

He has a reason for each trial
That we pass through in life
And though we're shaken
We cannot be pulled apart from Christ
No matter how the driving rain beats down
On those who hold to faith
A heart of trust will always
Be a quiet peaceful place

I'm praying that my heart would be so full of trust that no matter what goes on around me I would be at peace. Jared gave a great illustration (props to the Dr. Adrian Rogers) this morning about this. Think about a glass full of milk. When it gets jostled, what comes out? The milk. Whatever the glass is filled with on the inside will come out when it gets jostled. Its the same with us. Whatever we're full of on the inside is going to come out when we become jostled. My prayer is that I would be full of peace. Whenever I become jostled, the peace of God would come overflowing from inside of me. Lord, help me to have a heart of trust that will always be a quiet peaceful place. Thank you for Your gentle reminders that I'm not alone. You know the desires of my heart.

~Elizabeth