Nate- 2 months

Holy cow...I can't believe Nate is already 2 months old!  I've started back at work this week so life has been super crazy!  No pictures yet bc I'm still trying to get that sweet smile on camera!  He's so quick with his smiles...Here's the lowdown on what's going on with that boy this month:

~  Eating every 4 hours
~ Wearing size 2 diapers
~ Wearing 0-3 months clothes, some 3 months, and size 2 shoes!
~  ALMOST sleeping through the night...he usually wakes up once at an odd time (like 2) then up in the morning, but right back to sleep...(thank you Lord)
~ Pretty mellow except when his tummy aches
~  Happiest in the morning (that's when we usually catch his little coos and giggles)
~ LOVES the changing pad.  He can be going totally crazy with a meltdown and calm down completely when we lay him on there.  Crazy I know.
~ Starting to reach and grab at hanging things.
~ Still falling asleep during tummy time. :)  Must be comfy.

Sam is totally loving his baby brother.  Every night we go through thanking God for our family during our night time prayers.  We thank God for daddy and momma and he always says "Nate!" and I always say "And Sambo!"  He's also totally loving preschool.  He's learning so much and talking so much too!  We're working on potty training (which I hate) and working through temper tantrums and what you CAN NOT do when you're mad (I also hate), but I use the same talk with Sam as I do with some of my fourth graders!  LOL 


I'll post more pictures when I can...right now life is a crazy mess.  Laundry is piled up.  I haven't worked out. And I've got lesson plans to write.  Ah!  Hopefully I won't let my exhaustion get the best of me.

My mall revelation...

Today, Nate and I went for my 6 week checkup...can you believe it's already been 6 weeks??? I know..crazy, right? After my appointment, we ran to the mall to take back a shirt that Jared had bought for Sam (Texans of course). Below is the thought process that I encountered while I pushed a stroller/ate in complete silence in the food court:

1. Wet Seal? Is that store still open? I don't think that store will ever be in my "body type" anymore. Is that a mom pushing her stroller in there? Dang it...I'm jealous she can still shop there. Will I ever be able to wear non stretchy clothes again? Do I want to? No...not really.

2. What are all of these kids doing out of school? Is this normally what the mall looks like on a weekday? Good grief....someone should talk to their mommas.

3. I wonder if The Children's Place is having a sale? Sam really needs some winter clothes... and a winter coat for when it eventually gets cold...and some nicer shirts to wear to church. Is this what it's like being a parent? Never shopping for yourself? Well if it is...that's okay. I'm in sweat pants most of the time anyways.

4. Victoria's Secret....you girls make me sick! Even though you have your little flat tummies, I have stretch marks and two beautiful boys to show for it...so stick it! Was that unchristian of me? Probably so...but there has to be a positive outlook on my body that has not returned to normal yet. It happened so fast with Sam. Why is it taking forever to return to normal this time??? Ug..so annoying.

5. Am I officially a grown up? This feels pretty grown up. I'm not enjoying the stores, the amounts of people, oh but did I mention how I enjoyed eating by myself? Well not technically by myself. I ate with Nate. But he was a silent partner. And it was bliss.

Yeah...I'm thinking I've entered into some new strange territory. It's called parenthood. It's weird. I'm not sure where I fit in...certainly in the clothing department. Hmm...just some random thoughts that revealed a lot more to me than probably you.

Things I love about the "terrible twos"

In light of the "terrible twos" making the debut in our house...I've decided to focus on some things that I'm definitely loving about the stage that Sam is in right now. So...in no particular order, here are some things I just LOVE about our boy right now:

1. I love the way he sings songs like, "YES! Jesus loves me. The Bible tells me soap." or "That's Elmo's WOOOORRRRLLLLDDDDD!"

2. I love how Sam repeats EVERYTHING we say like, "Oh snap!" or "Big fat fail!" (guess who said that?!?) or "Where is it?"

3. I love how Sam is becoming a creature of habit...wait is that a good thing???? Yes it is. He knows every night that we read a bed time story and then a Bible story. However, he absolutely loves to read about "the giant". In fact, after we read a new Bible story he quickly flips through his Bible looking for the giant. :)

4. I love how Sam is so independent. At first, I was upset that I've already given him some negative traits like being independent or hard headed or obsessive. But I've since realized that his independence is teaching him a lot...and he's not afraid to ask for help after trying it on his own first (which makes me super proud).

5. I love to listen to Sam talk to himself about things that we've talked about. For example, the first time we did a puzzle together I would say "Is that where the cow goes? No! That's a pig!" Now, every time he does a puzzle by himself I hear him talking to himself the same way.

6. I love Sam's imagination. He really enjoys playing with trucks and blocks. Jared teaches him how to build things with his blocks and now he's always trying to build different things out of his blocks. He also likes to imagine his stuffed animals doing things, too...like Elmo and Cookie Monster sleeping.

7. I love how Sam is already a great big brother. He absolutely adores Nate. The first thing he does in the morning and the last thing he does at night (and all the time in between) is kiss and hug Nate. He loves to put the lid on the bottle and throw it in the sink for me. And he loves to let me know what Nate's up to. "Nate hungry" or "Nate talking" or "Nate sleeping". But my favorite is, "I kiss Nate" or "I hug Nate". SO STINKIN' SWEET.


So even though the terrible twos are here in full swing, there are lots of fun times in our house. It's so neat to see Sam learning and growing every day. I'm so incredibly thankful for both our boys and pray every day that they would learn to obey the Lord and love Him with all their hearts. What an amazing journey we are on...this parenting business. Crazy good, right?

A Change of Perspective

1. I love my husband. He is insightful and encouraging and a wonderful provider for our family.

2. I've been in a funk lately. Since coming home from the hospital, the thought of going back to work has literally made me sick to my stomach. I can't even think about it without bursting into tears. This happened with Sam too, but I remember the closer it got to my return to work the more excited I got. Not so this go round folks. Not so. This week we sat down to really look at the option of me not going back to work...and it just can't work. We would be in the negative before we even accounted for gas and groceries. Upon hearing these cold hard facts, I again burst into tears. You see...this time I know how fast time goes. Sam is already in preschool and I love picking him up everyday. I love our little predictable routine with school, lunch, snacks, puzzles, etc. I love everything about my days...even the dirty diapers and throw up. And to think that I'm going to miss it all in just three short weeks is devastating.

But my wonderful husband helped me to put things into perspective last night. Instead of looking at it like I "have to" work, it's more like I'm helping support our family. We do a lot of fun things, and if I didn't work those things wouldn't be possible. I love having family pictures taken by an amazing photographer friend, we like taking mini-trips over spring break with the kiddos, I enjoy being able to buy birthday presents for friends, and even though I don't enjoy running out of propane (which happens every winter) or having to repair the lawn mower, those things happen and if I didn't work those things would have to be charged.

Something else Jared reminded me of was not just what my income helps to provide for our family but for others. We have a Compassion child that we support, we like to give to different ministries in and around the area, and when a need arises we like to be able to help when we can. Those things aren't possible if I didn't work.

So here's to a new perspective. I'm thankful for a wonderful husband who reminds me of the positive things that can come out of things that seem sad to me. I don't know if things will always be like this...I certainly feel God's calling for me to stay at home, but for now it's not in the cards. Hopefully it will be, but for now...I'm okay with it.

Nate- 1 month old update

I can't believe it's already been a month since Nate came into this world! What a blessing he is to our family already. He's such an easy going baby and I pray that he would always stay my "little mellow fellow".

At one month Nate is:
~ Eating every four hours during the day
~Wearing size 1 diapers, size 0-3 months clothes (some newborn depending on the brand), and size 1 shoes
~ Starting to sleep longer during the night. Usually wakes up at 3:00 for a bottle then up again at 7:00.
~Starting to stay awake a little bit longer these days. Usually stays awake for an hour and a half after his breakfast bottle. Then awake for a long time in the evening.
~ Finding his hands to suck on and will occasionally take a paci.
~ Not caring for tummy time much, but holding his head up and looking around for short time periods.
~ Such a happy boy...only cries when he's hungry. Otherwise, he just looks around and watches what's going on.
~ Is already becoming a tough guy. Brother "loves" on him and is kinda rough at times but that doesn't bother him one bit.
~ Quite the "talker". Always making noises of some kind. Always happy ones, but just cooing or grunting. So cute!

You are God Alone

This song has gotten me through a lot of hard times. Isn't it crazy how listening to something can bring so much comfort in our times of trouble? I remember listening to this song over and over in my car everyday on my way home from work during the time that my father-in-law was staying with us on hospice. I would cry and pray and ask God all the hard questions before I got home and faced what would be there. I remember getting pregnant just two months after he passed away, and questioning why we couldn't have gotten pregnant earlier so that Joe would've seen our baby and this song comforted me then. And when we had a surprise pregnancy and lost the baby...this song got me through then too. And just this week, this song got me through another hard time in my life...watching my Granny pass away. There are things that I will never understand...like death. I understand it has to happen (cue "Circle of Life" music) but I just don't understand the cruelty of it all. Why do people have to suffer? Why does my Paw Paw (who was married to my Granny for 58 years) have to feel such grief? Why can't we all just die when we're supposed to in our sleep the night before? No pain. No suffering. No putting your family through the sadness of watching you slowly slip away. When I hear this song though...it puts things into perspective for me. It reminds me that, even though I am no where even close to having all the answers, God knows what's best. He has my life, and all of His children, in the palm of His hands. There is nothing that can happen to me that God can't handle. Even though I can't handle it. Even though I want to be in control. Even though I want all the answers. God's got this. And in the difficult seasons of my life, I need reminding of this. Big.Time. Even in the little, daily stresses of life when the boys are crying at the same time, when there are temper tantrums, when there are bills, when I don't want to go back to work God's.got.it.all.figured.out. I just need to trust HIM. If you haven't heard this song, take a few minutes to sit and listen. I pray that it would refresh your soul like it does mine....every single time.

Momma's gone!

My mom left today to go home. :( Now it's just me and Jared. I'm quite scared if I must confess. Jared keeps reminding me that we did this for a week before she got here, but he was home and I was pretty much incompetent. I couldn't sit up by myself and I could barely walk. Now Jared's gone back to work and I can get up by myself but the walking is still not back to normal. I'm ready to be able to do things like go walking, but it just is harder this go round. So the fact that I'll have two boys to watch by myself scares the living daylights out of me. Do people do this all the time? Yes. Do other people survive? Yes. But I'm still scared. Sam is pushing the limits BIG time. He does enjoy being the big brother helper and he LOVES Nate. He is always hugging and kissing him. But...he has his moments. I feel like I have to do the "1, 2, 3" business more times than I want to in a day. I feel like we're in this constant state of time outs. Although when my mom had to put him in timeout today I thought he was going to die! We're trying to potty train, too...which is not going so great either. I feel like there's just a lot of changing and adjusting still going on and I'm ready to feel "normal" (whatever that may be) again.



So here's to starting the week as a mommy of two boys...by herself. When you think of me or my husband or our sweet children...please say a prayer. I will survive, I know. But I'm just a little scared so far.